Why must Michael Bay movies always be so Michael Bay-ish? He can never resist the urge to throw in staple moments recycled again and again in his films. Transformers is no exception with its string of Michael Bayisms. Let’s see: someone using flares in slow-motion (check), government officials who know very little about what their dealing with (check), a cheesy romantic scene right before something heroic is attempted (check), men that become aroused from abusing their authority (check), the rule that the only females on screen should be Maxim models (check), an in your face score that believes it will make you emotional when played with slow-motion characters (check), war room dialogue that always starts with the word ‘gentlemen’ (check), Jon Voight (check), and action, action and more action (double check). Michael Bay always attempts to undermine himself with cliché after cliché, but this time he didn’t succeed for three reasons; Shia LaBeouf, Steven Spielberg and Industrial Light and Magic.
The special effects in this film are excellent and quite a sight to behold. Watching the robots transform from everyday vehicles into titanic droids is seamless, unbelievably realistic looking and worth the price of admission on its own. But Shia LaBeouf’s electric and witty performance is the paramount reason to buy a ticket. He is single-handedly able to transform Bay’s cliché ridden feast into a fun popcorn movie in which we actually care about the characters (or at least his character).
We learn at the films opening, that the world of Transformers has become extinct as a result of constant war between two robot clans: the Autobots (the good guys) and the Decepticons (the bad guys). The most evil Decepticon named Megatron crash landed on earth in the 1930’s and was frozen in one of the polar ice caps. He was searching for a cube on earth, which is the source of extraterrestrial robot life. Who made the cube and how it works I’m not really sure, but none of that matters since it is mostly a plot device designed so we can have robots rumble in the Bronx.
Looking back, it’s hard to figure out where this whole story got started, but I think it was a scene in which a helicopter Decepticon wipes out an entire military base somewhere in the Middle East. Next we are introduced to LaBeouf’s character Sam Witwicky, an average teenager who hopes to impress a girl at school with his new car. The car he recently acquired is a Transformer named Bumble Bee, who sought out Witwicky to protect him. Apparently, Witwicky’s great grandfather was a famous explorer who discovered Megatron on his journey and left an item of his possession to Sam after his death. The item is a pair of glasses (another plot device) that is wanted by the Autobots and the Decepticons. All the scenes with Witwicky are fantastic. He is a funny kid that attempts to be a smooth operator with his parents and chicks, but can’t seem to keep his foot out of his mouth.
The first half of the movie is humorous and charming, as we get to know Witwicky’s family and his quest to impress Mikaela Banes (Megan Fox). Then Witwicky’s car drives away and he chases after it on his mom’s bike. He learns that his car is actually a robot here to help him and Bumble Bee introduces him to the other Autobots who need his help.
Transformers seemed like Speilberg quality, with the great special effects as well as unique developing characters. But slowly and surely Michael Bay’s true vision begins to unfold. Bay had to cut to the government developments as they try to solve hidden computer codes planted by the Decepticons. There is even an Australian supermodel hacker that solves the riddle of the code, but still has to meet with some other hacker that lives with his grandmother, which follows with them being captured by the FBI for downloading top secret material. They are taken to an interrogation room and we cut back to them whenever Michael Bay is desperate for a ‘meanwhile’ moment. We also have the survivors of the Army base attack as they continue to fight another Transformer in the dessert. And it pains me to say that the great John Turturro plays the films most annoying character as Agent Simmons who waltzes into Witwicky’s house like a wild west sheriff to find out what he knows about alien robots. They might as well have given him a six shooter and a star shaped badge. Most of this stuff is pointless filler that could have been trimmed or completely removed.
The movie is thrown together as if Bay didn’t have the confidence explore only LaBeouf’s character, so instead he constantly cuts to scenes from all over the world. At times, it’s like Michael Bay’s version of Babel. The battle scenes between the robots are also frustrating because it is impossible to tell what is going on. One robot alone is stunning, but the fight scenes consist of robots duking it out like two cage fighters. As soon as their metallic bodies merge, all I could see was a shiny blurry image of constantly scraping and shifting metal. And that is basically all we see for the last half hour of the film, which goes on way too long. And don’t get me started on the middle of the film, which totally rips off the Area 51 scenes from Independence Day.
Yes, Transformers is a flawed and goofy film, but it is also a lot of fun. The writing toward the beginning is very funny. Most of the action sequences are exciting, though they’re no where near as thrilling as Speilberg’s War of the Worlds (which is a masterpiece next to this film). But despite Transformers blemishes (thanks Mr. Bay) LaBeouf has worked his magic again. He is a natural actor who continues to impress me film after film. So see Transformers for the f/x, but mostly for LaBeouf’s performance, then rent Disturbia when it comes out on DVD and wait avidly for LaBeouf’s turn as Indiana Jones’ son.
B
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